As I have been processing and praying and thinking about my life there are some things that need to be changed. Some things I don’t have room for, some things I have outgrown, but they still follow me, and some things just need to be blown up. All of this in an effort to make room. Maybe even allowing some empty space, room to breathe and grow and just be. It makes me smile to write that, to imagine that.
I want to carefully examinen pretty much everything- how I spend my time, what I think is important, what we spend money on, how we parent and ask some tough questions. I would love to figure out the place that writing holds in my life.And be willing to make changes as needed. I am ready to disappoint people and do things different and the get the side-eye, that’s fine. I’m cool with it.It’s more important to me to move ahead coming from and heading towards a place of health. I want to take a look at ideas, ways of doing things, and obligations that I have bought into over time with fresh eyes. I want to blow some things up…I am so ready for that. I feel it in my bones and my heart.
I have pretty much always believed that more is better, with a few exceptions of course, but overall- to have more is to be better off. And I am not sure that is the truth. To have more things requires a lot. There is the upfront cost, then the physical and head space it takes up, then there is the managing, cleaning, moving, maintaining aspect of it as well. It’s exhausting. And I think I am over it. So I hope to do some editing. Some picking out what I love and what is needed and doing away with the rest. Trying to live a life that is more aligned with contentment rather than consumerism. And I want to model this for the little ones sleeping in the room next to me- I want for them to see that my happiness doesn’t just come from pretty things, although those things are certainly great & fun, but that life is wonderful even if we don’t have EVERYTHING. In fact, life can be better.
And why do I feel the need to share that? Great question. So glad you asked. Well, I think that I might not be the only one who is ready for some changes. I hope this is more hopeful than rant-y. Either way…fireworks are the best. Blowing stuff up can be beautiful, and I look forward it.